It Has Not Been the Best of Weekends

I'll try not to be too much of an empêcheur de tourner-en-rond-- a kill-joy-- but suffice it to say, this weekend was not the best. Things could always be worse, but then, they could always be better, too.

This weekend, two of my classmates from high school, whom I haven't seen for months, visited from Abilene. It was nice to see them and catch up, and I was fortunately able to find them in the cafeteria for dinner on Friday night. Now, I was supposed to go with them to the football game on Saturday, but this is where the first misfortune happened. You see, my friend Meghan (who was hosting them in her dorm room) collected our tickets during the week, so I was supposed to sit with them. However, I missed the game entirely because I had no idea that it was scheduled for 11:30 AM instead of the usual 6:00 PM. It was only at about 4:00 in the afternoon, after having spent most of the day diligently doing homework in the library in order to finish it before the game that night, that I discovered my mistake. And then I found out the Aggies lost, on top of it all. I just don't know why Meghan didn't call or text me, but I guess she was preoccupied during the game.

Then, this morning, my friend Evan was supposed to meet me for mass, but he was so late in coming that I had to resign myself to a spot in the adjacent chapel and watch it via camera and TV while he ended up going to the student activities center for the second, simultaneous overflow mass that started a bit later (St. Mary's is so full of people they have not only four different scheduled times on Sunday alone, but often two masses going on at one time during those timeframes). Anyway, this isn't the first time that I have tried to go to mass with people who have been late, and at our church, you have to get there decently early if you want a seat.

Speaking of mass, it was raining (and chilly) when I got out, so I rode my bike back to my room through the precipitation before going to lunch, where I ran into Meghan and L'nae before she had to leave for Abilene. While it was nice to be able to say goodbye to her, I learned something unsettling from Meghan.

I had been wondering if she would go to mass this weekend since she was hosting our two protestant friends. Apparently not. She told me they had gone to St. Thomas Episcopal church (I missed why that church specifically; I think Rebekah's brother goes there) and explained how it was similar to a Catholic liturgy, but their way of celebrating communion was different. Out of curiosity, I asked her if she had merely observed this difference or if she had also taken part in it, to which she replied nonchalantly that she had indeed participated in their communion service. I tried to point out, as graciously as I could, that she shouldn't have done that, but she insists that it's all about what one personally believes (one of the weakest relativist arguments I've ever heard). Immediately after that, I learned from her that while they had tried to find the Church of Christ here in College Station (L'nae and Rebekah are Church of Christ), she learned from our classmate Trever that his girlfriend was in town and that he and she were going to the service there but didn't have enough room in the car to take the girls as well.

A note to my non-Catholic readers: I am not making a case against you, here; I have a lot of respect for my brother and sister Christians, and I don't expect you to always agree with what I believe. My gripe here is with my fellow "Catholics" with whom I should at least be able to agree if we claim that name. What I am about to say is not meant to be exclusive or to draw boundaries out of an outdated sense of "us vs. them" but rather, to make an appeal to logic and the conviction of our faith (which I thought we shared).

You must understand that two of the most important things that make us Catholic are our obligation to attend mass each week and, most core of all to our faith, our belief in the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharist. Without getting into the complexities of this doctrine, simply understand that to a Catholic, Holy Communion is not merely a symbolic meal, but a metaphysical, miraculous sacrament wherein we receive not bread and wine, but Jesus' precious body, blood, soul, and divinity and signify our spiritual communion with all of our Catholic brothers and sisters throughout the world AND history.

Ordinarily, non-Catholics are not allowed to receive communion at mass, although they are welcome to come forward to be blessed, and by the same token, Catholics are not to receive communion at non-Catholic churches because those churches are not really in full communion with ours, and to do so would compromise and scandalize our belief in the Holy Eucharist.

Additionally, Catholics are ordinarily obliged to attend mass at least once a week on the Sabbath (either Saturday night or any time on Sunday), and to willfully miss mass is a grave sin. This is not meant to be a dictatorial imposition. Rather, the Church, knowing what is best for our souls and entrusted to the guardianship of those souls and God's Truth until Jesus' return, in her wisdom has placed this obligation upon us for our benefit. I cannot speak for others, but for myself (and I should think for other Catholics who strive to strengthen their faith through its practice and reception of the sacraments), attending mass is a joyful opportunity, not an unpleasant burden I do out of a sense of fear or duty. It's the difference between "I've got to go to mass on Sunday" and "I get to go to mass on Sunday" (and indeed, every day of the week if one wished).

Basically, it distresses me (and to be honest, at first, it angered me) to hear that two people who profess to believe the same thing as me, apparently do not. I'm trying very hard not to be judgemental, as it is probably a case of a lack of true understanding on their part (isn't it always? "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."), but is it so much to ask that people at least put forth the effort to seriously contemplate what they do, in fact, believe? Personally, I've never been able to depend on any of my Catholic classmates in high school (except maybe one, occasionally) to help explain Catholic beliefs to those who wanted to know more, and I hate to be cynical, but this doesn't really surprise me that they continue in their apathy.

I hope that my readers will not mistake my sentiments as a condemnation on their part, but rather understand my deep sense of disappointment and betrayal. If you and some friends belonged to a club, but they started compromising the values and core mission of that club, wouldn't you feel the same? Only in this case, we are talking of no mere club or social organization, but religion, which I believe is one of the most polarizing topics of conversation simply because it is tied with our core values and helps define who we are.

I feel the same way about supposedly Catholic politicians (John Kerry, John Edwards, Ted Kennedy, Kathleen Sibelius, etc.). Why bother calling yourself something if you don't agree with it? Why not just leave? You'd be in good company: King Henry VIII, Martin Luther... Just please don't fragment the already shattered body of Christ more by basically living a lie. At least have the courtesy and the courage to say what you really believe and stop being a "cafeteria Catholic."

Anyway, I don't know if I should even say anything to them or not bother; it's one of my struggles, being charitable, but then again, do I even have a responsibility for them anyway? They're big kids now, and I'm tired of holding their hands, always being there to represent Catholicism to others so they don't have to do any work.

"Let him who has ears hear."